Monday, 6 December 2010


I have a bedtime, 1am, it's a sensible hour, I asked for it, but dammit I can't keep to it. I suffer insomnia and lying in bed for hours on end getting stressed and upset isn't especially appealing. I desperately want to keep to my bedtime, when my sleeping is normal and I get to bed at 1am, or earlier, I often dream about snuggling up with him. It comforts me to know that I've done as he asked and makes me feel close to him.

I have all but exhausted the suggestions on how to beat insomnia: lavender oil, rescue remedy night, nytol, kalms, no caffeine, lying in bed for hours, getting up and doing things, having wind down time, having a bedtime routine, only going to bed when tired, going to bed at the same time, forcing myself to get up at a sensible hour, allowing myself to sleep, etc, etc, etc. You get the picture! Nothing works.

It's so frustrating. I know he understands and I can't help it but it's so frustrating. I want to be a good girl and my dammed body wont let me!