Sunday, 21 June 2015

Slaves have no choice?

One popular idea is that slaves have no choices once they are owned. Others do not agree with this concept. Is this an accurate statement for you?

 I sort of covered this in my last post, but I'll try to go a little deeper today.

I'm not 100% sure where I stand on this one; I know slaves who are involved in certain decision making processes, their thoughts and feelings are all taken into account, but ultimately their Doms have the final say.

To me though, for some reason, I cannot get out of the mindset that being a slave equals no say at all, no choices, no opinions, no nothing, and that is why I have never identified as a slave myself. I like having opinions and being able to express them. I want my thoughts and feelings to be taken into account, I need to feel listened to and I like to feel appreciated and for some reason, in my head, being a slave rules all that out.

I'd like to have a more open minded attitude to slavehood, I don't want to feel I've ruled out being a slave in a future relationship, but the reality is that, at the moment, I have because of my unfounded opinions about what it means to be a slave. I am frustrated by myself and by those opinions, hopefully they will change soon.

Monday, 15 June 2015

Do you feel slavehood is a calling?

Do you feel slavehood is a calling?

I so want to say yes to this question, I would love to be so confident in myself, my sex drive, my urges to serve that I could scream "yes, slavehood is calling me" from the rooftops. But I don't think it is.

I identify as submissive, no doubts about that, but I am also very...selfish I suppose. I know what I want, how I want it and I want to be involved in my relationship decision making too. I want to feel like a submissive equal, if that makes sense?

I want a 24/7 D/s relationship, but I want my say in the big decisions too. Now, I know some 24/7 D/s relationships allow for that, but I don't want to blindly wander into slavehood with my Dominant assuming that everything is deferred to them. I have thoughts and opinions and knowledge and I want to feel able to share that.

Maybe, in fact very probably, my idea of slavehood is totally wrong, but to me a slave has much less say in the relationship, the big decisions, etc than a submissive and I don't feel comfortable identifying as a slave. At least not yet, maybe in time that will change, with the right person maybe I will trust enough to give up all decision making and control, but right now, at this moment, I'm too much of a control freak to let go all the way!